The day was coming to a close it was getting darker and darker and I had not seen my boyfriend Johnson. I was at my close friend house faith, waiting for him. He texted me that he would come over to see me, I had not seen him for days and I already missed him so much despite how angry I was I still missed him badly and I really wanted to see him.
I was scared I would not see him because my dad already called that he was on his way to pick me. I thought my dad was going to send the driver so I would make an excuse that my friend, faith, wanted me to sleep over. But apparently it turned out that he was the one coming, so I planned to use the same excuse on him which I doubted and it turned out the way I thought so I went home angry at the fact that Johnson did not come to see me and he did not bother to text me and the fact my dad shouted on me because I told him I wanted to sleep over.
On our way home I did not say a word to him because I was very angry even when he wanted to stop for ice-cream and pizza I said no so we went home straight, on getting to the house I greeted my mum with a very low tone but she did not hear me so she thought I did not greet her she then asked me why I did not greet her and I answered rudely she got up with an angry face came to where I was and gave me a resounding slap that I would never forget for generations to come.
I went to my room crying that night not only because of the fact that I received a resounding slap from my mum but for the fact that my dad shouted on me that same night and Johnson did not come to see me and he did not text me either.
Two years ago, I watched death steal my daughter away from me. I have not forgiven myself till now and I do not think I will anytime soon. It is all my fault. I forced her into it, I pray God forgives me. My heart is filled with so much pain and sorrow. Judith was a pretty kid. She was brilliant, respectful, and hardworking and filled with so much life. This was who she was until her father, my husband died. He was her best friend and play mate. I felt so bad for her when he passed away yet, there was nothing I could do about it, and never could I take his place in her heart.
However, my husband’s death was not as painful as the pain my daughter had to go through. She was only 16 when my brother-in-law, Tony, abused her sexually. I came back home that day and I saw my daughter looking scared. I wondered what the matter could be. The usual me is quick at concluding so I concluded she was missing her dad. Judith and I never had a heart to heart talk. I have always been a career woman to the extent that I returned to my desk barely a month after I gave birth to her. I loved my daughter but I had to fend for my family. My husband always attacked me concerning this issue. He even accused me of being a careless mother. I got Judith all she ever wanted and everything she could ever need. She always got the best things available on the market, clothes, shoes, bags and all my baby was an expensive kid. I often got jealous because all the stuff I got Judith were no match to the relationship she had with her dad. I remember her tenth birthday when she said she wished her mum could love her as much as her dad did. I felt so bad and horrible wishing she could understand I was the breadwinner of the house. Continue reading LONELY ME→
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